Simple Summers Long Ago

     Give me back those simple summers with fireflies and the smell of burning leaves.  Those fun filled carefree days when everyday was special and no day was planned, when you would run free all day not knowing the need to worry.  Meeting your buddies (the gang) at one of the neighborhood hangouts.  You could spend all day outdoors running from place to place, doing everything and nothing.  Days were filled with endless sunshine, it never seemed to rain, at least not enough to remember.  Nothing mattered more than the daily adventures with friends.  We lived unscheduled lives which some may say lead to unproductive lives but I say it led to adventure and creativity.

     We socialized without constant supervision, making our own decisions, building relationships with others, making mistakes and learning.  Our decisions were small but satisfying and our failures had consequences.  We learned to share our penny candy and soda without the worry of germs (cooties, which has a less threatening sound). The only worries we had were the ones we manufactured in our active little brains.  This hasn't changed but today, kids are also now bombarded with worries from adults.

     Today it seems to rain constantly on kids, not the typical wet rain but the rain of information on schedules, germs, strangers, technology and achievements.  While these are worthy concerns, there may be something worthwhile in having a schedule and technology free day with your child to see them make small personal achievements without the direction from an adult or Google.  "Just Saying...."

New Orleans and Gulf Shores

     Our vacation this year took us to New Orleans, Louisiana then Gulf Shores, Alabama.  We stayed at the Lafayette Hotel, which was very nice and in a good location to all of the sites.  We had some excellent meals at Oceana (French Quarter) and Muriel's (Jackson Square) while we were there.  We cruised down Bourbon street like most tourists and watched the crazies, there were many and it was a weeknight.  Breakfast at Cafe Beignet was good, really who would turn down a funnel cake for breakfast.  

     The next morning we took a plantation tour (Oak Alley) which turned out to be an adventure just getting there.  Maps are rarely used nowadays with GPS available on smart phones but as we found out you can still be misdirected.  We never question the GPS directions but just blindly follow along where they take us, confident we will arrive without any problems.  Well, this time the GPS decided to make our trip a bit of an adventure taking us down a country road the dead ended on top of a railroad crossing without a road on the other side, WTF!  Apparently this wasn't enough fun so we were then sent down a dirt road that went through a cornfield dodging puddles and hoping we didn't have to stop because we would have been stuck in the middle of nowhere.  As we exited the dirt road to the paved highway both John and I had our iPhones set to the GPS and no lie, one phone told us to turn right and the other said turn left, thanks Steve Jobs.

     We decided to go old school and follow the signs on the highway arriving a short time later at Oak Alley.  Looking at the car when we got out it looked like we had been 4-wheeling through a swamp, mud was caked all over.  I ask the girl selling tickets if anyone has had a problem locating the plantation using GPS and she said "Oh yes, for some reason GPS directions don't work well for our location." That would have been useful information earlier in the day.  The plantation tour was interesting and informative but depressing to see how slaves were treated.

     Our last day in New Orleans were went to Lafayette Cemetery in the Garden district to see the above ground crypts then drove around the Garden district to see the beautiful mansions, fun morning but now we are off the Gulf Shores.

     We stayed at a VRBO (Vacation Rental By Owner), which was a 2-bedroom, 2-bath apartment with a full kitchen, family room and a large balcony overlooking the beach.  This was the more relaxing part of our vacation spending mornings at the beach, taking a dolphin tour, hunting for ghost crabs at night with iPhones.  Ghost crabs are little white crabs that are almost invisible when they a motionless on the sand.  We watched others as they would catch the crabs and put them in buckets, not sure what they did with them, too small to eat.  One day drove over to the Marina and watched the boats come in with their catch of Red Snappers.  

     Crawfish was a popular menu item in Gulf Shores and we had it in grits and macaroni and cheese.  It was very good but I guess you could substitute shrimp and it would probably taste similar.  Another fun relaxing vacation with a bit of off-road adventure to spice things up.

Why?

     I often wonder why certain things are the way they are when it seems contrary to my particular logic.  My recent purchase of a new pair of glasses which included cleaning liquid and cloth.  I was warned not to clean my new glasses with my shirt because the lenses could get scratched, but I opted for the scratch resistant lens so what was the worry.  I was told they are "scratch resistant" not "scratch proof". The definition of "scratch proof" seemed obvious in that they can't be scratched but "scratch resistant" seems more vague.  

     How resistant to scratches are my lenses if you can't use a cotton shirt to clean them?  This is somewhat puzzling since I always wear a cotton shirt and my shirt tail seems like a perfect vehicle for cleaning my glasses. The shirt tail is readily available and always at my beck and call and if some moisture is needed because of caked on dirt then isn't that why God made saliva.  

     The answer seems obvious to me.  Opticians need to make lenses that can be cleaned with your shirt tail and saliva.  It makes perfect sense and it could be a great marketing campaign.  Maybe use a snarky-animated character like those insurance commercials. Yes, I know the guys selling the cleaning liquid and cloth wouldn't like it but sometimes you just have to choose who you want to please.

     Using saliva to clean your lenses may disgust some people because society is so concerned about germs but I don't think germs can jump from you lenses to your eyeball. I can almost hear people grabbing their hand sanitizer and spritzing their self at just the thought of using saliva on their glasses.  This is just one of many things that puzzle me but I think MacGyver would be proud of my ingenuity.

Respect

     Something is terribly wrong with the world and I think it comes down to lack of respect.  It appears crime is on the upswing, more murders, rape, theft, gang activity and terrorist activity.  Now maybe someone will throw out a statistic that shows a certain crime has decreased but overall we all know the world is moving in the wrong direction.  It's a sad situation and many perpetrators of these crimes are the young.  Committing a crime against someone shows you have no respect for them but it shows even more.  A criminal has no respect for his parents or those that care for them but most importantly they have no respect for themselves.

     You can't have respect for someone else if you don't respect yourself.  Respect is not something you are born with, it's a learned attribute taught by your parents, family or loved ones.  It takes a diligent effort of adults to teach respect to a young person.  When I was young if I did something disrespectful and my parents weren't around to correct me, some other adult would take on that task.  I believe it is every adults responsibility to teach respect to the young even if you are not responsible for them.  However, this doesn't seem to happen in today's world because parents always defend their kids despite their actions.  They don't want anyone else correcting their child, you could damage their child's self esteem. This attitude establishes entitlement in the child and shows disrespect toward others.  I know adults are not always right but neither is a child, in fact children are always pushing the envelope to advance their independence.  There is nothing wrong with pushing the boundaries as long as you remain respectful of others.

     I have noticed that people or groups that have a strong Internet presence will attract people that blindly follow them.  If you blindly follow others are you choosing their life over yours? May be we are searching for something and latching on to an idea or group that will bring us attention.  Respect yourself and be true to yourself.  "Just Saying...."

Grand Canyon and our Arizona adventures

    John and Cindy picked us up and laughed at the (stick) lizards we had glued to our front door.  Reference my story on 6-1-2008 (The Twisted Ironic Tale of the American Stick Lizard).  

     We flew into Las Vegas and spent a few hours there checking out the casinos before heading out to Flagstaff, Arizona.  It was cool crossing over the Hoover Dam, we stopped for a few minutes to view this impressive manmade creation that we seen many times in movies.  Just as in the movies there is a line painted in the road separating Nevada and Arizona at least there was at the time.

      After the first night in our hotel we got up early for the drive to Grand Canyon.  Flagstaff is in the northern part of the state and it gets cold there, in fact it was snowing when we left the hotel.  As we left for Grand Canyon, skiers from our hotel were loading skis for a day in the mountains.  We purchased a National Park pass, which covered our car for the whole week at any National Park and it only cost $25, great deal!  Grand Canyon was awesome, we hiked about an hour down the trail, took many pictures.  It's hard to describe and pictures don't do it justice.  We would have loved to hike all the way down may be next time.  John had me hold on to him as he leaned over the edge to get a better picture, kind of made me nervous.  I took some pictures of the stick lizards I brought for my wine label (Stick Lizard Chianti). Great Day! How could we top this tomorrow?

     The next morning we toured the Petrified Forest and the Painted Desert.  Our first impression of the Petrified Forest was not so good but it got better quickly.  The Painted Desert was incredible with beautiful multi colored landscape.  We had bought hats at Grand Canyon, I had a Crocodile Dundee type hat so when we stopped for lunch I asked the ranger if we would have any trouble getting back in, he said "No problem, with that hat, I'll remember you".  We also ask if we could walk down into the desert, he said "Absolutely, some people camp overnight".  This was exciting so after lunch we went back to the Painted Desert and hike around the rest of the day.  Another wonderful day!

     The next day we drove to Sedona but on the way we happened upon Slide Rock park which was a great side trip.  There was a river going thru the park spilling over these huge flat rocks.  The water was crystal clear and cold.  It was great fun to hop from rock to rock and dangle you feet in the cool water.  As we drove from Flagstaff to Sedona the temperature warmed almost 30 degrees in just an hour drive.

     Sedona was beautiful; the red rocks almost seemed unreal. We spent time hiking up the nearest mountain, which was exhilarating. The town of Sedona

was unique and fun plus it was surrounded by the amazing red rock mountain landscape.  The trolley tour guide pointed out the peaks of two of the hills that looked like Snoopy and Lucy from the Peanuts cartoon.  We also learned about the many celebrities that owned property in Sedona.  This is a town I would love to visit again and spend more time there.

     Our last night in Flagstaff we had a great dining experience at the Matterhorn restaurant nearby, this place was almost empty, which is usually not a good sign but that was so not true. John and I ordered cioppino, I'm not sure what Mimi and Cindy ordered, all I remember is that we were all pleased with our dinner.  The more surprising thing was that the owner came out to talk to us, spending at least a half hour telling us about his background as we peppered him with many questions.  He was originally from Austria but left at age 15 to join the merchant marines which is where he honed his cooking skills.  He travelled around the world and worked in many places.  He married a girl from Brentwood, Missouri that he met when he was working for Breckenridge Hotel in St. Louis.  Although he travelled extensively his favorite place and where he planned to retire to was Lake of the Ozarks, Mo.  What a great dinner and interesting guy.  This was a perfect way to end a great vacation in Arizona.

You can always say "No"

     I've noticed that some people have a hard time saying "No".  It may be the personality of these people to be of a generous nature, they are interested in helping.  However, sometimes it could be guilt, not because they have done anything to feel guilty about but they are made to feel guilty by the person asking for a favor.

     Guilt is the tool that many religions use to motivate you to take action on their behalf.  Unfortunately, many others including employers use guilt to get more out of their friends or staff.  Some may do this unintentionally but others use it because they know it works.  The thing is that we all have the right to say "No" without feeling guilty.  Saying "No" to someone else can mean saying "Yes" to yourself.

     Emotions are powerful and feeling guilty is a strong emotion.  If you have done something to feel guilty about then that's valid.  If someone tries to make you feel guilty in order to manipulate you that's wrong on their part.  Your first priority is finding and maintaining your happiness which means your needs come ahead of others.  Once you have fulfilled your needs you will have time to say "Yes" but on your terms.

     Don't say "Yes" because of guilt but do say "Yes" because it's your choice.  Guilt is a negative emotion even if it forces good results.  If you are forced to act because of guilt you will be resentful and this will damage your self-esteem.  Of course these are just my opinions or beliefs based on my life experiences so feel free to disagree.

     Exercise your free will to say "No" when you feel pressured to say "Yes".  It's empowering to know you control your life and the decisions you make.  Say "Yes" when you know it's right for you.  "Just Saying...."

The Trial and Tribulations of Boating

     I've owned a pontoon and multiple ski boats over many years. My sister (Rose) and I loved to go water skiing.  We introduced many of our friends to boating and water skiing.  We spent many weekends out at the lake with our families until the kids got older and interested in other activities.  Boating was always fun for me but it was not problem free plus it was a lot of responsibility.

     Most of our boating was on small lakes about an hour & half from home.  Mimi was not as enthusiastic about boating as me so I would try to get our outings planned well so it made life easy but things did not always work out.  Sometimes it was the bad weather that would pop up in the middle of the day chasing us off the lake. Lightning was always worrisome, it concerned me because of the others in the boat, so I would do my best to get back to the dock as quickly as possible.  I remember one day when we had dock the pontoon because of bad weather but the wind had caused the boat to pull away from the dock (rope came untied) so Bud (my brother-in-law) and I ran down to retie the ropes when we heard this clash of thunder that scared the BaGeeBees out of us.  It sounded like it hit right next to us.  You never saw two people run so fast without expecting a trophy.

     When summer is over it's time to winterized the boat, that means draining the lower unit and filling it with antifreeze plus a few other task, none of which are difficult.  Sometimes I did this myself but other times I paid the storage place to do this for me.  I would always remove the drain plug during the winter because the cover did not keep the rain from seeping in the boat and it could fill up with water.  This happened on time when I picked it up in the spring.  The place that winterized the boat didn't remove the drain plug so while driving home trailer in my boat I wondered why it was so hard to pull, Yeh! Filled with water, not good.  Next time I found a new place to winterized and store my boat and they removed the drain plug but they didn't put it back in, now I should have checked this, but I assumed they reinstalled the plug (rookie mistake).  I don't know what they did with it but it wasn't in the boat.

    Being excited about launching the boat the in the spring I neglected to check the plug. I know, stupid move, so I launched the boat filled with gear and people then waited in the harbor for my brother-in-law (Bud) to launch his boat.  While waiting for Bud my boat was filling up with water.  As we motored to beyond the "No Wake" zone I throttled my boat to full power but it bogged down badly.  I opened the hatch for the engine and found the water filled the entire engine bay.  Holy crap!  The engine was still running but even an inexperienced boater knows this is a big problem.   We returned to the ramp as quickly as possible and everyone jumped out.  I ran to get the trailer, while Bud got in my boat to drive it on the trailer.  Well, we got it out successfully but it wasn't easy to get the water filled boat on the trailer.  We drained the boat, I bought a drain plug and we continued the day. Whew!


     Usually my wife (Mimi) would drive the boat on to the trailer because she didn't like to back up the trailer, I admit it wasn't easy. So one day for some reason she said she would get the trailer, I agreed and tried to explain the technique for backing a trailer down the ramp.  She got out of the boat beaming with confidence and went to get the car and trailer.  After waiting for her turn in the line of cars/trailers she attempted to back the trailer down the ramp, mulling over my detailed instructions, I'm sure.  Well, after about 4 attempts she gets out of the car and throws up her hands stating, "I'm done" leaving the car/trailer jackknifed on the ramp. "What the hell" I'm thinking.  Since I'm in the boat there is little I can do.  There happens to be a guy watching this circus act and he offers to back the trailer down the ramp, which Mimi accepts graciously, but I'm thinking I hope he doesn't steal the car/trailer.  He backs the trailer down the ramp and I drive the boat on to the trailer.  I thanked the man for his kindness and I hoped we provided him a good laugh for the day.  Are we having fun yet?

Bigotry & History

     What is the definition of bigotry?  According to the dictionary it is someone that is stubborn and completely intolerance of any creed, belief, or opinion that differs from one's own.  What does this really mean?  The phrase stubborn and completely intolerance are the key words, which make someone a bigot.  Why, because that phrase implies negative action, verbally or physically, toward someone without your beliefs.  

     Some people are accused of being a bigot because their religious beliefs don't align with today's new moral standards. Having different beliefs does not make you a bigot.  If you treat everyone with respect and compassion even though you don't support or understand their beliefs, you are not a bigot.


     Does calling someone else a bigot make you a bigot?  If someone doesn't have your beliefs why would that alone make them a bigot?  History has proven that bigotry has always existed but society as a whole has made positive strides however prejudice will always exist.  Inanimate objects do not cause bigotry.  People teach bigotry. The most recent news has been regarding the confederate flag.  The confederate flag is a historical flag about a time in US history, yes the South believed in slavery, but I bet the first thoughts many people had when they saw a confederate flag (prior to the recent tragedy) was "Dukes of Hazzard" not slavery.


     As a society we need to look forward not ignore or try to change the past.  The past is what it was like it or not.  Do not be thin skinned or you will never be satisfied.  If you hide history or it's symbols you are doing a disservice to society.  Knowing the past will help you gauge the improvements made today.  Compare today to the past to see the positive progress.

  


     Many people will say there have been very few improvements but to that I say. Visit a plantation and see what life was like prior to the Civil War, visit the Tower of London and listen to the torture people went through in the middle ages, look at how the American Indian was treated, there are many examples in every country. History tells stories of bad things and good things but that doesn't mean we should close down our museums because they tell bad stories, it's our history, we can't change the past but we can learn from it.

     There are terrible atrocities that are happening to people today but it is the action of people.  Of the many things to be concerned about in the USA, do you really think the eliminating the confederate flag should be I on the top of the list?  I don't.  Seems like the news media and society are always ready to support the vocal minority.  "Just Saying...."

Things I Miss

     I have many fond memories of my childhood; in fact I have fond memories from each stage of my life.  As a young kid it was all about hanging out with friends, running around the neighborhood, playing ball, hide-n-seek, really any outdoor activity but we also played board games and had puppet shows.  

     As I got older in high school I made new friends and had new experiences like learning to drive, cruising on a Friday night through Steak n Shake going to school events.  It was similar in college but now being more responsible I had a job and goals.  Going to concerts and sports events were an important part of college life.

     Meeting my wife (Mimi) and her family was another big event in my life, which brought many fond memories and laughter.  Family always created great memories for me.  Playing all day with my kids was as much fun for me as them.  Teaching my kids to ride a bike, swing a bat, kick a soccer ball or fly a kite was an achievement for me as much as them.  I thoroughly enjoyed those moments and think about them often.  Seeing your child laugh uncontrollably, the expressive look on their face when they discover something new like sledding down a snowy hill is a fun memory.

     You may have owned many cars, clothes, jewelry, toys and other material possessions but the fondest memories are the good times you had with others.  Buying a fancy watch, cool car or fast boat was exciting but without your family and friends to share your life experiences these material possessions would have little value.

     How much fun would you have driving your cool car without anyone sitting next to you?  Don't get me wrong we all need and want things but as you get older you realize that things are not as nearly as important as they might first appear to be. 

     I hope you are still making memories with friends and family, playing cards, enjoying a barbecue or just sitting around talking and laughing maybe even reminiscing about old times.  I love seeing my kids as grown adults and listening to their stories and laughter about their life, those are good memories for me too.  Today's good times will be tomorrow's fond memories.

     I guess my story title is not totally accurate since these are my memories I didn't miss out on them I keep them in my memory so every once in awhile I go back in my mind and relive these moments just for a brief time.  Like most people life has brought me good times as well as bad but the funny thing about my brain is that it seems to put a fog over the bad things making the good memories more prominent.

     Many people collect things, stamps, coins, beer cans, fishing lures, etc. but I never was in to collecting until I realized I collect friends and memories.