Where's the Beef?......Everywhere I look

    My wife (Mimi) had just left for work so I was decided to wash the dishes early so I would have the rest of the day to play.  When my wife works I try to clean up because that's the right thing to do.  I am a surface cleaner, I don't dive deep into the world of dirt, I just knock the big chunks off.

     Doing the dishes is pretty easy and it gives the illusion that a lot of work was done.  I was almost complete with only one container of leftover beef and it's juice so I poured it into the sink and turned on the garbage disposal but to my dismay the sink clogged.  I waited a few minutes expecting a miracle from the plumbing Gods to clear the clog but I guess the planets were not aligned so the clog remained.

     I knew where the clog was from previous battles with the kitchen plumbing so it was an easy fix.  The hardest part was removing all the cleaning supplies from underneath the sink.  Pricey Pfixer had just sent us a new diverter because ours was going bad (annual issue) so I thought maybe this would be a good time to change the diverter as well.  I didn't really want to so I thought let's just see how this goes before I tackle the diverter.

     I have cleared enough plumbing clogs to know that no matter what I do there will be a mess.  I removed a portion of the cleaning supplies from underneath the drain trap and placed a pan below the trap to catch the water.  I cautiously loosened the plastic threaded connector caps since I expected a small initial surge of water coming from the drain but to my surprise the small surge was more like I had punched a hole in the Hoover Dam.  Water but not just clean clear water, beef and it's juice flowed out like a fire hydrant spewing this tainted mixture of beef over me and the inside of the cabinet.  The pan I placed underneath the trap was barren as a desert (a colander would have been just as useful) but the cabinet and its contents were floating in slightly aged beef juice.  I was dripping with juice plus strings of beef were hanging from the rims of my glasses.  This was not going as I expected.   I took quick action to sop up the juice and beef floating on the floor of the cabinet.

     Now I had to remove the rest of the cleaning supplies so I could do a deeper cleaning of the cabinet and the contents, something that was foreign to me.  At this time I decided I would replace the diverter since I had to empty out the cabinet anyway.  As I removed the bottles and containers from the cabinet I noticed they were dripping with juice and beef.  Great just great, now I would have to clean each container before I put it back.  Once the cabinet was empty I cleaned the inside, it seemed like there were strands of beef everywhere.  No matter how many times I wiped it down I found more beef strands and all I could think of is the Arby's commercial "We have the meats".  It’s like the beef mutated and produced more beef than originally existed (notice the Twilight Zone theme song playing in your head).

     Finally the cabinet was clean and I stood there pondering the situation, scratching my head watching dried beef falling from my scalp, yes you heard it right, I said beef.  I decided to replace the diverter before reassembling the trap so I went to the garage to get some old boat cushions I use when working on the kitchen plumbing to cushion against the back pain from the cabinet, not my first rodeo.  I have changed the diverter many times so I expected this operation to go well (see my post "Why Circus Performers would be Good Plumbers" on 8-4-14), but first I must turn off the water or I would be back to square one.

     Installing the diverter and reinstalling the plumbing trap went without a hitch so my job was done and Mimi would be happy to know I had replaced the diverter.  I won't tell her that wasn't the original plan, but she will probably find out.  Woo Hoo, It’s lunchtime maybe I’ll head over to Lions Choice for a delectable beef sandwich, nay!  I don’t think so.