Free Range Drivers

     I have noticed more free-range drivers than there have been in the past. You may wonder what I mean by free-range drivers. If you are familiar with free-range chickens, you already have a basic understanding. These are people that drive their cars like lanes don't exist. They roam back and forth from one lane to another without a care in the world. Their roaming is particularly noticeable on double left turn lanes. After making the turn they take any lane of their choosing, left or right maybe even back and forth. Don't expect them to use blinkers, these free roamers don't understand why they are needed.

     Due to my experiences with the many free-range drivers roaming the streets I have acquired an innate ability to detect a driver about to make a free range move. This ability cannot be taught in classes. It can only be acquired by the experience of driving in traffic.

     There are two types of free-range drivers; the aggressive roosters (male or female) that know full well what they are doing by crossing multiple lanes but just don't care. Then, there are the roaming hens (male or female) that just seem to float from one lane to another, oblivious to the world or the other people around them. So, how did these people become free-range drivers? Well, I don't know for sure but one theory is that they first learned to drive a boat where there are no lanes. Although I'm not sure that theory holds water, yuk yuk because I know people that have boats, and have had a smooth transition to driving cars without becoming a free-range driver.

      So, do I have an answer to this problem? No, I don’t, but I have a temporary solution. It's just two words, boat bumpers, preferably the big ones. Tie them to your door handles. The downside is that it will affect the aerodynamics of your car and it might attract attention but isn’t attention what you want and need. “Just Saying…”