Squirrel

I had setup an interview with the lady who ran a retirement home. Her name was Shirley. Since it was a nice day we decided we would do the interview outside in the garden.

     “Tell me Shirley, what is the most difficult part of running a home like this?”

     “Well, that’s easy. You become attracted to the people who live here, so —Squirrel.” Shirley pointed to the squirrel that was running up the tree trunk. Then she continued the conversation without missing a beat. “when they pass it’s really difficult. It’s almost like a close relative has died.”

     I ignored the random comment about the squirrel and asked a second question. “What is the favorite activ—.”

     “Squirrel.”

     I tilted my head and started again. “The favorite activity of the residents?”

     “We’ll, that’s more difficult — Squirrel, — since we have so many. I think going to an outside activity like a ball game would be on top. She turned her head toward the bird feeder. “Squirrel.”

     “You seem to be fascinated by the squirrels. Tell me about that?”

     Shirley frowned. “What makes you say that?”

     “You keep mentioning them.” 

     “When? I’m not sure —Squirrel, Squirrel— what you’re talking about.”

     I decided to change the subject. “What’s your background? How did you end up running a retirement home?”

     “I worked at a taxidermist. Very interesting,” Shirley whipped her head around “ —-Squirrel—- but the owner was weird, kind of squirrelly, you know?”

      “Yes, I’m getting a sense of what you’re talking about.”

      Shirley stood up. “Thanks for coming over, but I need to break now. It’s time for my morning snack. I have a strict regimen with my diet.”

      “I understand it has been very interesting. What is your usual snack?” 

      “Nuts . . . I like nuts. You really can’t have too many. I never seem to get enough.”

      “Perfect.”

Tipping

What I was taught about tipping is that it was based on the service you receive. I’m primarily speaking about the wait staff at a restaurant. They take your order, answer questions, make suggestions, take substitutions, etc. They provide a service above and beyond what you might receive at a fast food location.

     The personality of waiters and waitresses can make your meal more enjoyable. They deserve and earn a tip based on how they serve you. Their hourly salary is minimal so a tip is vital to them. The low salary they make is an issue that needs further clarification in another post. 

     The hourly wage of fast food workers has increased to $18 - $20 an hour over the past few years, but the service to the customer has gone unchanged. In addition to the wage increase, many of these fast food restaurants have tip jars or an extra line on the receipt for a tip. Why do they deserve a tip? They do not provide any of the service that a wait staff does at a traditional restaurant.

     We are being guilted into tipping everyone even those that don’t earn a tip. All my life I have experienced people/groups trying to guilt me into doing something.  Now, every time I go to pick up a pizza, fried rice or a sandwich I am forced to address the tip question. I know it’s my choice to tip or not, but I feel it’s an imposition to ask when the only service they’ve provided is hand me the food I paid for. 

     Sometimes I choose to tip when I pick up a to-go order, but usually just a dollar and only when the person handing me my order shows me their personality with a smile or laugh. You’ll be surprised what a smile or laugh will get you. “Just Saying . . .”

Have you seen . . .

I’ve been around for 76 years and seen many things change, so I’m not surprised by most changes. But have you seen the commercials about deodorants. They imply that we stink all the time and all over. Do people stink more now than in the past? I mean when we grew up we used underarm deodorant but only under our arms. We didn’t cover our whole body. We bathed or showered and used soap, usually scented, which has a pleasant smell so there was no need to spray our whole body with deodorant.

     I find the commercials annoying if not insulting. To quote on ad, “I use this all . . . over.” Then she pulls her pants top out and sprays her crotch. Really? Is that necessary?

     Most people are smart enough to know you shower after a hard workout not before. So using more soap will allow you to use less deodorant. The truth is every body product is scented, shampoo, conditioner, creams, hair gel and then there’s perfume and aftershave. So why do we need another artificial scent on top of another artificial scent?

     Commercials sell products and help pay for television, but they don’t have to be annoying. The advertisers talk down to the viewers and try their best to influence us to buy what they are promoting. I understand how that works but your approach is irritating.

     Sorry about the rant, but while I’m at it, I don’t like the commercial with the guy advertising the razor, specifically designed to shave his junk. 

     Things change, I get that, but I’m an old guy so when I see something that bugs me I say it. You’ll be here someday. “Just Saying . . .”